May 2009
32 posts
Coming to terms
Deride Trader Joe’s as sickeningly stuff white people like, but where else will you find a $3-per-sixpack, 6.2%abv canned lager that is called Simpler Times?
Two from Rennselaer
1. Lax security is one of many appealing aspects of train travel that will disappear if train travel ever becomes mainstream in the U.S. The fact that you can walk right on is awesome, but you can’t use it to argue that everyone should ride trains.
2. The neighborhood I just moved to is split by a major interstate. The speed of newly de-highwayed cars and the fluidity of ramps present new...
Grizzly Bear - Graceland. Had never heard this...
More on the trades
From Matthew Crawford’s “The Case for Working With Your Hands,” in the NYT Magazine
There is good reason to suppose that responsibility has to be installed in the foundation of your mental equipment — at the level of perception and habit. There is an ethic of paying attention that develops in the trades through hard experience. It inflects your perception of the world and your...
1. Goals can even be good for extended leisure. If you don’t set goals for your extended leisure, you end up frittering it away doing the same stuff you do in the cramped leisure spaces of your everyday life.
2. The woman who cut my hair today was inspired to become a hairdresser after a single bad cut ruined much of her high school experience. “All I had going for me was my...
Jeffrey Lewis - Roll Bus Roll. New album out...
Onward
You know that Vonnegut book Timequake? It’s sort of about a ‘timequake’ which sends us all back ten years. Finding ourselves in the past but unable to change the course of events, we all mentally sit back and enjoy/suffer the show. Finally, after ten years of space-time autopilot, we’re back where we were before the timequake, and chaos ensues, because everyone’s...
from Bart Gets an F
Bart slaps himself in class after the exam is over. Martin calmly turns in his test, dressed in a Hawaiian shirt and wearing shades. Bart answers the final few questions as Ms. Krabappel asks him to turn in his exam. She pulls out `Old Red’ and grades the exam as Bart watches sadly, cringing at every X-mark. Bart got a 59, another F. Bart can’t believe it. Neither can Ms....
German word of the day
Ohrwurm - translated literally, “earworm”: a song stuck in your head.
Deer Tick is the first band featured on Brian Williams’s new web series, BriTunes. I’m in the library without headphones, but it looks like you might get a kick out of it. In any case, this is way better than Charlie Gibson’s lame GibzJamz.
(from PDD)
Or whatever
A buddy was saying last night that grad school has forced him to reconsider his conception of his own masculinity, since it has prevented him from acquiring the conventional signifiers: steady and substantial income, property ownership, and a female significant other.
I thought that characterization seemed outdated, and a bit of an exaggeration. But here’s a datum to sort of support it: by...
Louis Armstrong - Stardust (alternate take)
...
Fats Domino - My Girl Josephine
Recent recs
Nina Paley, Sita Sings the Blues
Patrick Suskind, The Pigeon
My mother was a tailor
We lost a lot when we lost skilled craftsmanship as a viable set of career paths. Imagine being a cobbler, say. Seems like just the right combination of intellectual stimulation (a novel problem every so often), meditative mindlessness, and the potential for pride in work.
Visual aid
Re-enactment at 2:20-2:30 (see below). (From what should have been a Very Special Episode of The Jeffersons, “George Gets Locked in the Bathroom”)
The Perils of Living Alone
me: hey
i got trapped in the bathroom this morning
kroupenian: why did you hehe at me last night?
hey!
wow simultaneous messaging
me: because your status was funny
but i GOT TRAPPED IN MY BATHROOM THIS MORNING
kroupenian: hahahahahah
whoa!
how?
for how long?
how did ou escape?
me: the doorknob came off while the door was closed, and i was inside
kroupenian: omg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
me: i quickly realized that there was no way to fix it
so i commenced screaming and pounding on the wall
kroupenian: you could have died
!!!!!!!!!
me: thinking i would have gotten a neighbor's attention, been able to have a conversation with them saying to go to the super and get a key and let me out
instead
i don't hear anything until i hear a loud banging at my front door
which was
three cops, guns in hand, kicking my door in
kroupenian: HOLY MOSES!
How long were you in the bathroom for?
me: and then come to my bathroom and are shocked that it was just some wimp stuck in the bathroom
kroupenian: hahahahahahahahahaha
me: all in all about 25 minutes
but it could have been who knows how long if i hadnt been screaming
kroupenian: were you really screaming? or just shouting calmly
me: i was shougting "HELLO! HELP!"
kroupenian: WOW
me: the "hello" was meant to indicate non-emergency
but it didn't
kroupenian: that is the craziest morning in the history of mornings
well
did the police say what the person who called them said?
me: no
i didnt ask, was too embarrassed
kroupenian: they were probably expecting a little old ladyt who'd slipped int he shower
haha
sad
me: i could probably find it in the police reports
kroupenian: you shouldn't be embarrassed!
what else could you have done?
me: exactly y
you cant go halfway
you cant be like "HELP! NON-EMERGENCY SITUATION!"
kroupenian: hahaha
well you could
obviously that's what you should have done
that is so insane
is your heart still beating really fast?
me: NO
i meant no
kroupenian: how long ago did you escape
?
me: like two hours
kroupenian: wow
kroupenian: my goodness
me: my bathroom is a little messed
i accidentally broke some stuff trying to escape
kroupenian: yeah and your door is broken down
wow
me: i felt like in kill bill two
where she's trapped in the coffin
kroupenian: oh amn
me: that is literally what i was doing
what if no one had come????
kroupenian: trying to claw your way out through the ceiling?
i know!
me: i would still have been in there
kroupenian: do you have a window in the bathroom?
me: freaking the fuck out
no
kroupenian: wow
me: it's very interior
kroupenian: i think that the police should have recognized your trauma
and not made you feel embarrassed
me: it's not like getting stuck in the elevator
whatever they are insensitive
once they realized i felt bad they were nice
but still
kroupenian: that's good
me: they themselves had been very scared
kroupenian: really?
me: they thought there was a murder or something going on
kroupenian: oh MAN
me: because they were shouting at my door and i was only responding with 'HELLO! HELP!"
kroupenian: did you hear them?
me: no
kroupenian: ah
i can see where the confusion comes in
but you did the right thing
and got yourself rescued
MAN
me: yes
it puts things in perspective
kroupenian: yikes
did you ever read about that guy
kroupenian: who was trapped in an elevator for 48 hrs?
me: yea the new yorker dude
kroupenian: yeah
that stuff is wicked traumatic
he never recovered
me: i would have literally gone crazy
kroupenian: we'd have found you by monday
no, you would have discovered inner resources you never knew you had
and i bet you could've busted down the door or set a signal fire or something
i will be scared to go in your bathroom now if i ever come over
me: i could have gone macguyver style
i had neosporin, a nail clipper, towels, a scientology book, and antibiotics
kroupenian: why a scientology book?
weird
me: ironic bathroom reading
kroupenian: if you'd been trapped int he bathroom for 48 hrs you would have emerged a scientologist
that would have been a weird direction for your life to take
me: that is probably true
kroupenian: wow that is so crazy
well i just got out of the shower so i have to go get ready to start my day, but i will be looking ascance at m bathroom doorknob the whole time
i am glad you escaped!
askance
also i still don't know why MARTA! is a funny status update
me: doesn't it have to do with arrested development?
kroupenian: no
maybe!
me: ok ill let you go i have to study
have a good day, keep the door open
kroupenian: it's also the best female soccer player in the world, who i saw play last night
i will, you too
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